Dolores "Dee" Cotner Allen

It is with great sadness and heaviness in heart that the family of Dee Cotner Allen announces her passing after a long and well fought battle with cancer on May 19th, 2025.

Dee was at different times in her life a ballerina, a model, a therapist, and many other things that those who got to know her were constantly surprised by when she would say those wonderful words, “you know I used to do that at one time.” If “leave no stone unturned” was a person, it was her. 

Everybody who met her was at some point potentially taken aback as to how she existed. Where many of us have different personas we wear when we deem appropriate, Dee was always...Dee. A warm hug of a soul who also made sure you heard what you needed to hear. A practitioner of love in one of the most complete senses of the word. 

Her years as a mother and therapist leave a mark that is seemingly impossible to comprehend the reaches of. Phone calls at one in the morning, taking therapy out of the room to meet people and be with them in the reality of life, leaves a string that will be traceable for decades on end. We as people only know how to love others to the capacity of which we are capable of loving ourselves. Growth is not always pretty, the best decision in many cases is not the fun or easy one to make, and anyone who knew her in her lifetime knew that when it came time to make the jump, or walk shakily forward, she was right there to back you up. Even if you felt you were blindfolded and trying to look out for obstacles, that patient, loving, and kind soul was on the other side to keep you headed true in any way she could.

She loved to laugh. For as deep a waters she could dive into, she had a levity to her as well. Loved her cop shows, a good glass of wine, or a steakhouse where every waiter and waitress inevitably knew her name.

Because for many of those that got to know her, work with her, or even just experience her for a short spell on a random crossing of paths, they would often leave with a little piece of her. It often times looked like a belief in themselves or a sigh and dropping of shoulders they had been holding on to for years, maybe decades. Maybe a joke, and a “how are you” that for whatever reason came with a safety and an undeniable warmth to it, that let you know when she said “it will all be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, it’s not the end” she not only meant it, but that it was also true. These are just a handful of the gifts that she seemingly had an infinite supply of.

So for those of you who got to know her, the greatest gift you can give in remembrance of her is to hold that gift close. Continue to love in hugs, tears, tough conversations, and everything in between.